I’m back. The past year in my teaching career was one of the craziest yet mainly because I had a child. She is completely wonderful, fabulous, lovely, and just perfect in every way. Here she is:
I will be honest and tell you that being pregnant first semester and then a new mom second semester (I wasn’t out of the classroom long because my maternity leave was over Christmas break) did not combine to make 2010-2011 the most productive year of teaching. That doesn’t mean I didn’t do my best everyday; it means more that I just plain don’t remember a lot about last year because I was tired, swollen, stressed, and then tired, stressed, and sleep-deprived. But my little girl is here, and like many have said to me, being a mommy is my most important job right now.
Add to this mix a big move for my family. My husband was accepted to a teacher-training program and so at the end of the school year I left the school at which I had been teaching for five years. Just today, they removed my class website. It hurt. I had built such strong bonds and relationships with my coworkers that I was devastated when I really knew I had to leave. I was in tears for the last week of school, and it was all I could do to hold myself together as I handed my keys to my principal. I will miss them all so much; words can’t describe how much I will miss them.
Luckily I did get a job at a new school, and what a gig it is. I will be teaching AP Literature, Honors English IV, and Speech and Debate at a wonderful school in Winston-Salem. It’s really one of the best jobs in the area. I got other offers, but really wanted to be at this school in order to challenge myself professionally. I knew this was the next step for me.
And right now, I’m really nervous. I don’t really know anyone, and I don’t have any freshmen or standard classes. For the last five years, I’ve been a teacher of both freshmen and seniors. I’ve taught standard and inclusion freshmen. It’s been so fun to put books in their hands like Hatchet, Cirque Du Freak, etc. But I’m in a position now where I am responsible for preparing seniors for the rigors of college. I’m nervous but really excited. I tend to get anxious about my job all the time; I think that’s ok because it means that I do care about what I do and how good of a job I do. But I can’t let these nerves get the best of me.
I was comforted when I read these tweets from my hero, Jim Burke on #engchat last night:
I realized as I read this that we are all always improving. While Jim Burke is the hero to many of us English teachers, he, too, was once in our shoes, nervous about teaching AP Literature. And look where he is now. Look what he’s done. I’m not going to be the next Jim Burke or anything, but I know that when I’ve been teaching as long as he has and when I have had the chance to learn that much that I’ll be telling stories of my first years. I’ll talk to someone about how scary it was to be at a new school but how it worked out in the end.
So, it’s time. School’s almost back in session. My husband’s summer classes are over, so I’m free to go out and work in the daytime. Tomorrow I’m taking my Teacher’s Daybook to a cafe along with my textbooks and computer. I’m filling out my personal and professional goals for the year and I am giving this year my best. Every single day matters to me. There are so many beautiful poems, stories and novels for my students and me to read. I can’t wait to spread out some clean paper and begin the work of piecing together my course. Choosing poems. Thinking of new activities. Borrowing ideas from the amazing minds I know on Twitter and the EC Ning. I’m excited about the possibilities this year brings for me and for all of us. No matter what happens in the media or the government or in any school district, I know what amazing dedicated educators are out there because I read their tweets and blogs daily. We’ve got a long way to go–who doesn’t. Students need to work harder; teachers must always improve practice. But I have hope at this time of the year for all of us. We are doing the good work of this world by educating kids.
I’m going to go finish Beauty Queens right now and giggle a bit before bed. Here’s to the New School Year!
Tags: back to school, being a parent, collagues, doing your best, expectations, heroes, nerves, planning, relationships
Firstly, your little girl is precious! Enjoy every moment because they do fly (my baby girl will be sweet sixteen this year).
As for your teaching challenges, all will be well. You have a great pln on the ning and twitter and you are clearly a dedicated, inspiring teacher in your own right. But who doesn’t think Burke is like English teacher royalty?
The first year of teaching while parenting is a challenge for sure! I remember the exhaustion and not much else. But one thing that being a mother has done for me is to see my students more clearly as someone else’s child. I think it increases my desire to do better for them as a teacher. “What would I want for my son?” is a question that comes up frequently in my mind as I make decisions in the classroom. It’s a change in perspective.
I can only imagine how hard it was to leave, but this sounds like an excellent opportunity for you! I’ll be cheering you on like the rest of your Twitter & ECN teachers. Enjoy this time to pause and reflect as you plan.
This is a great blog, Jenny. You’re right there in the soup with the rest of us. Royalty? No way… Just a fellow teacher who’s been planning all day with colleagues and who will figure it all out as I go as we all do. Love that baby! Nothing changes you more as a teacher than to realize that everyone of those darlings in your class has a family at home that brought him or her into the world with the same hopes for happiness you have for your own.
Jim
I am enjoying watching that little sweetie of yours grow up. She’s beautiful and getting so big! Congratulations on all the big changes in your life. I can remember crying my eyes out when I had to leave my first school. I was surplussed and sent to another school in my board. I hated leaving, and yet I found the next school as wonderful as the first – made new friends, took on new challenges. By getting to know you here on your blog, at ECN and on twitter, I can say that you are such a thoughtful teacher that you will be great in your new job.